It's Okay To Cry
by Pxx and Axx
Summary: The rain poured down heavily. One shot


**My first fanfic story. When I began writing this, I didn't know what it was going to be about. I just went along with what my fingers typed on the keyboard. Please read and review. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Azumanga Daioh or it's characters.**

The rain poured down heavily. Tapping on the window. A simple pattern. The dark, gray sky reflected the misery the ground was feeling from the force of the rain. And the howling wind was unforgiving to anyone risking a walk outside. Nanashi Kagura looked out the window and sighed. Another day wasted. Another day of doing nothing. It had been raining for the past three days and during all three days, she had done nothing but stay inside. Her athletic body yearned to go outside. Be active, it'd tell her. I can't, she'd say back.

Kagura was wondering why she was wishing for the rain to let up. Even if it did, she still wouldn't be able to go outside. Her physical status was currently at it's worse. Maybe it was a sentimental thing, but the rain made Kagura more miserable than she already was. She laid her head on the uncomfortable pillow she had become accustomed to the past few weeks. She looked around the hospital room. Flowers and "get well soon" cards from friends, family, and people she didn't even know lined the wall next to her bed.

She looked back out the window. The weather was fine, beautiful even, just a few days before. Then all of a sudden, the weather changed. It became dark, and the rain poured like a disease to the earth that wouldn't go away. Persistent. It reminded her of her life. One day it was fine, the next it became filled with gloom. Why did this happen to me, she asked not herself. She didn't really ask anyone particular. She knew no one would answer. She just asked. It made her feel better, in a way.

She then closed her eyes, remembering.

_Nanashi Kagura. Age 21. Leukemia._

"Leukemia," she said out loud. She had to hear it. It made the situation all the more real to her. When she first found out she had it, she became numb. She didn't cry, she couldn't. Crying shows you've admitted defeat. And even if she couldn't accept it, she had already admitted defeat a long time ago. But she still didn't cry.

The door to her room opened, but she didn't open her eyes. Just someone coming to give her false hope. "You're strong, you'll beat this," the false cheerleader would say. The person sat in the chair next to her bed. Kagura's eyes remained closed.

Then there was silence. Minutes passed, though how many Kagura didn't know. The silence was deafening. It stung the ears as it hung in the air. Kagura opened her eyes, her eyes to the ceiling. She looked to her left, to the person sitting next to her bed. She had to admit, she was surprised at who she saw. A person she hadn't seen since high school. With a face so different, but still the same.

"Tomo?"

The once hyper wildcat solemnly nodded. This couldn't be Tomo Takino. This person seemed serious, something Tomo wasn't. "Hey Kagura. I would ask you how you've been..."

"How did you know?"

"Yomi. She called me."

"Oh." Silence.

Tomo patted her pants. "Oh, yeah. I have something for you." Tomo reached into her pocket and pulled out a piece of paper. She read it over, making sure it was the right one, then handed it to Kagura. "I made it."

Kagura read the paper that Tomo had given her. _Kagura...I win. _Kagura scrunched up her face in confusion. "What?"

A grin stretched across Tomo's face. "I win. I stayed healthier longer." Kagura looked at Tomo in disbelief. She didn't know why. It was just like Tomo to turn her situation into a competition. Tomo frowned. "You get it," she asked.

"Yeah, I get it." Kagura put the piece of paper on her desk.

"That really wasn't the response I was expecting." Tomo shook her head.

No, this was Tomo. She was the same inconsiderate person she always was. "Of course it's not." Kagura said softly. "I'm dying, and you want to make a joke out of it?" Kagura's voice gradually increased. "That's just like you Tomo Takino. You don't care about anyone but yourself, do you? You know, after three years, you're still the same. When will you grow up?"

Tomo was taken aback by this sudden out burst from Kagura. And to Tomo's surprise, her feelings were hurt. Tomo looked down. "I'm sorry." Tomo stood up. "I really am. You're right, I don't care about anyone but myself. That's why I practically begged to be excused from training camp to come visit when Yomi called me. But don't talk to me about growing up. You're the one who needs to grow up!" Tomo looked at Kagura with a look that she had never seen before. A look of sadness, and anger.

"What?"

"Yomi told me how you've changed. How you've just given up on everything and everyone. How you've become cold and distant. And how you make everyone feel bad about themselves no matter how they try to help you. If you would at least try, and not feel sorry for yourself, who knows, you might've been better by now. I tried to cheer you up in my own way. A stupid balloon or a card or flowers is too expected, cheap and simple. Sue me for trying to help."

Kagura let this sink in. Tomo was right. She had become increasingly distant from her friends, by her own choice. She had become a bitch to everyone she knew when all they wanted was to help. She had given up on the world. She had given up on her friends. And she had given up on _herself._ Kagura felt a strong wave of sadness pull at her eyes. She began to cry. But it felt good. It felt good to feel. It felt good to let out all of her emotions.

Tomo, expecting another out burst from Kagura, was shocked when she began to cry. "Crap." Tomo went over to Kagura. "Hey, I-" Kagura grabbed Tomo and began to cry on her shoulder. Tomo was taken by surprise, but when her brain registered what was happening, she hugged Kagura back.

"Thank you Tomo."

"For what?"

Kagura didn't answer, at least not out loud. She couldn't explain to Tomo how thankful she was. How Tomo was finally able to make her realize it's okay to cry. It doesn't mean you've admitted defeat. It shows that you care.


End file.
